I Like This.

I like this song. It fits J and I's relationship to a T. So I am posting. Feel free to read or pass by. I am posting so I may come back and read from time to time. I can't wait for this portion of my life to be over with. The empty promises, lies, abuse, mental anguish, worry, and hurt is just too much for me. After dealing it for 6 1/2 yrs then splitting and getting back together only to continue to deal with it the same way all over again adding a total of 8 years. Its just too much for me. After some tells you things over and over do you start to believe them? Sometimes I do. But I made a choice a few months back not to. Not to deal with this and have slowly made myself distant, again. I cannot tell you the anticipation I feel to be rid of this apartment with him and him. Is it possible to "love someone" but not truly be "in love" with them? Do you ever just stop those feelings? I feel as though I do "love" J to a point, because he has given me two beautiful children, but I do not feel as though I truly am "in love" with him any longer.

Rihanna-Stupid In Love.

Stupid in love
Oh
Stupid in love

Let me tell you something
Never have I ever
Been a size 10
In my whole life
I left the engine running
I just came to see
What you would do if I
Gave you a chance
To make things right

So I made it
Even though Katy
Told me this would be nothing
But a waste of time
And she was right

Dont understand it
Blood on your hands
And still you insist
On repeatedly trying
To tell me lies
And I just don't know why


This is stupid
I'm not stupid
Dont talk to me
Like Im stupid
I still love you
But I just cant do this
I may be dumb but
I'm not stupid

My new nickname
Is you idiot
(Such an idiot)
Thats what my friends
Are calling me when
They see me yelling
Into my
Phone

They tell me let go
He is not the one
I thought I saw your potential
Guess thats what made me dumb
He don't want it
Not like you want it
Scheming and cheating
Oh girl, why do you
Waste your time
You know he aint right

Telling me this
I don't wanna listen
But you insist
On repeatedly trying
To tell me lies
And I just don't know why

This is stupid
I'm not stupid
Dont talk to me
Like I'm stupid
I still love you
But I just cant do this
I may be dumb but
I'm not stupid

Trying to make this work
But you act like a jerk
Silly of me to keep
Holding on
But the dunce cap is off
You don't know what you lost
And you wont realize
Till I'm gone, gone, gone
That I was the one
Which one of us
Is really done

Ooh
No
No
No no
I'm not stupid in love

This is stupid
I'm not stupid
Dont talk to me
Like I'm stupid
I still love you
But I just cant do this
I may be dumb but
I'm not stupid

I may be dumb but
I'm not stupid
In love